Spend My Life With You
- Tara & Michael Jackson
- 1 day ago
- 5 min read
(When reading this the italics is #NewOldBae's voice)
If you had told me three years ago that I’d be writing a post about soulmates while sitting in my mom’s basement - a basement I now share with #NewOldBae, the man I once loved, lost, and somehow found again - I would’ve laughed. Or cried. Or both.
Life has a funny way of circling back to the people and places we thought we’d outgrown, only to show us that maybe we just needed time to have different experiences and grow into them.
For me, coming back to this point in life started long before we ever reconnected. When I was preparing to come home, I made a conscious decision to get my life on track. Prison has a way of forcing you to confront who you’ve been and who you’re willing to become. I knew I wanted more than survival - I wanted stability, purpose, and a real partnership.
So I wrote a letter to the woman I hoped I’d one day call my wife. I didn’t know her name or her face, but I wrote about the man I was committing to be and the life I was determined to build. What I didn’t know then was that the woman who would eventually read that letter had already been part of my story once before. She wouldn’t see it until three years later, but somehow life was already aligning chapters I couldn’t yet imagine.
And maybe that’s the part that still amazes me the way timing works when you stop trying to force the story. We didn’t come back to each other as who we were. We came back as who we had become.
When we reconnected, it didn’t feel like chance. It felt like recognition. Like meeting someone who stepped effortlessly into a space I had already made room for - not by accident, but by intention. This wasn’t about reclaiming the past. It was about finally being ready for the future.
So today, I want to talk about soulmates - not the fairytale version, not the “love at first sight, perfect from day one” kind. I’m talking about the real kind. The kind that challenges you, stretches you, breaks you open, and then helps you rebuild. The kind that doesn’t always arrive at the right time but somehow shows up when you’re finally ready to see clearly.
“Our love wasn’t lost; it was simply waiting for us to grow into the people who could finally hold it.” - Anonymous
When I think about soulmates now, I don’t picture perfection. I picture growth. I picture two people who have lived enough life to understand what they want, what they won’t accept, and what they’re willing to fight for. The messy, beautiful, unglamorous parts - late‑night conversations, apologies that take courage, forgiveness that takes even more.
I don’t believe soulmates come around more than once in a lifetime. Not because love is scarce, but because that level of connection - the kind that feels instinctive - doesn’t repeat itself. You recognize it over time, in the everyday moments. Finishing each other’s sentences. Thinking the same thoughts. Even coughing in sync and laughing at how natural it feels. We downloaded an app called Paired, and you can’t see the other person’s answers until you respond - yet most of the time, our answers are nearly identical. Not rehearsed. Not planned. Just aligned. That’s how I know.
Somewhere in the quiet proof of our everyday sync, we stopped explaining what a soulmate was and simply started recognizing that we were living it. And honestly, I picture #NewOldBae and myself.
"Love heals where we have been, allowing us to explore where we can go."- Harold W. Becker
It’s taken years, distance, and a lot of growth to understand how our story unfolded the way it did. We met in 1999, circled the block in 2022, married in 2023, and have been happy ever since. Our story hasn’t been linear. It hasn’t been smooth. We’ve had disagreements, disappointments, and hard conversations. It’s not the kind of love you can wrap in a bow and post as a highlight reel. But it has been real. Honest. And ours.
Being with Tara has been unlike any relationship I’ve known. Not because it’s been easier, but because it’s been truer. She’s taught me that love isn’t about winning or control - it’s about compromise, patience, and choosing understanding over pride. Loving her has stretched me and softened me, and shown me what it means to grow alongside someone, not over them.
When we reconnected, there were fireworks - but there was also familiarity. It felt like recognizing a song you haven’t heard in years, the melody tucked somewhere in your memory, waiting for you to hum along again. There was comfort in that. There was clarity.
Moving back in with my mom wasn’t part of the plan. But here we are, building a home in a basement, laughing through the chaos, learning how to share space again, and choosing each other intentionally this time. I’ve learned that soulmates aren’t defined by the setting - they’re defined by the connection.
#NewOldBae sees me - not the curated or “I’m fine” version - but the raw, unfiltered, vulnerable parts. And he stays. Not because he has to, but because something in him recognizes something in me.
Thinking about where I am now, I’ve realized that a soulmate challenges you to be better without making you feel like you’re not enough. Someone who listens, even when the words are messy. Someone who understands you - especially after years of being misunderstood.
Sometimes a soulmate is someone you’ve loved before. Someone you had to lose to learn. Someone you had to grow away from so you could grow back toward each other with intention instead of impulse.
Timing shapes love just as much as chemistry does. Life has to soften you, humble you, teach you - before you can truly show up for someone else.
“A soulmate is not found. A soulmate is recognized.” - Vironika Tugaleva
I used to think soulmates were rare. Now I think they’re recognizable - but only when we’re ready to see them.
Maybe your soulmate is someone new. Maybe you haven’t met them yet. Or maybe, like me, they’re someone who once held your heart and somehow found their way back to it.
So yes, I’m writing this from a basement - our beautifully imperfect, intentionally built home. And I’m writing from a place of peace, clarity, and gratitude. Because sometimes the most unexpected places become the backdrop for the most meaningful chapters.
We don’t believe love is about destiny as much as it is about alignment - two people choosing each other again and again. What we know now is that soulmates aren’t proven in grand moments, but in consistency, compromise, and shared growth. Our story didn’t follow a straight line, but it led us here: rooted, intentional, and certain that the best chapters of our lives are still unfolding.
Until next time…thanks for listening!
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